A View from the Trees

Rock-a-bye baby,
in the tree top,
When there's no dancing
we all seem to stop.
When the dance breaks,
the babies will call,
Come to me Mommy,
let's play baseball.
~ Jen

I make no apologies here. Though these lyrics may be boring, the original ones are horrid. They need to be changed, and the above is my personal rendition. Eff it. Less-than-stellar and without creativity, maybe, but I'll take these words any day over boughs breaking and babies falling... lifelessly. from trees. So... there's that...

While reading/singing/petting/hugging/begging the monkeys each day and night to sleep, it's become quite clear to me that the very best (and wanted) things in life happen organically. Naps included. While trying unsuccessfully to lull my bunnies to sleep, I imagine myself being comforted by an 11-foot-tall gentleman with a very large pair of J.Crew boxers trying to lull me to sleep at 1pm daily. I swear, no matter how many David Gray tunes he sings to me, and who cares how many forehead massages he attempts, I'm sorry... If I don't want to nap, I'm not going to sleep, dammitt. I'm just not a napper. Sooo, I feel for the kiddos. And this is the mentality I go into monkey naptime prep with. I'm like a toddler advocate without balls.

Oh, but I am also a mom, so. They nap. Believe me.

And upon waking these days, they want to ride bikes to the playground. That means, I'd better be ready for a brisk walk at effing 7am. And at 4pm. Which entails AJ riding his tricycle and Lila pushing her stroller. Both deals come with encumbrances, mind you. AJ's bike "falls over" (when landscapers and tennis players dart too quickly in and out of his way and he succumbs to his greatest fears of... quickly moving humans), and Lila's baby "Dessa" falls out of the stroller, causing oh-so much angst. Especially if said stroller and landscaper meet at an intersection, oh man. That's tough. [We think the name Dessa was spawned from Tinkerbell's BFF Iridessa. Who Lila randomly despises and fears. Hates, really... How do I even know this? It's like a toddler soap opera. I'm oddly entranced. I digress.]

Then it's 7:08am. And we get to the playground. A sweet little enclave in our neighborhood, with only about a hundred ways a toddler can strangle him/herself or leap to his or her death. I keed. OK, maybe only fifty.

I looked up quotes on "safety" and was able to find a ton. Each with less than ten words apiece. Quotes like, "Safety doesn't happen by accident" and "Chance takers are accident makers" and "Unsafe acts will keep you in stitches" and "Better dead sure than sure dead".

Hm. How about, "Twin toddlers can make one think every minute of every day about how Safety can be taunted to the point of making it run away... scared of its very existence. Safety can go on and run home, dammitt. No longer needed. AJ and Lila have gone to the very bad side of danger and they LIKE IT. Safety? Meet Danger - the monkeys' very new and dearest friend."
? Huh? Good times.

One of my dearest friends came down from PA to visit me last week with her two sons. We all went to the beach and I felt like an overwrought, insanely worried parent. Her (quite honestly, amazing and sweet) 9- and 10 yr-old sons wanted to play along the surf with my 2.5-year-olds. I was frantic. She was not.

I found myself to be worried that I'd be "that" parent. The one who hovers. The one who follows. The one who aimlessly travels behind her kindred loves and pants. Is breathless with fear and safety issues. So, while AJ and Lila dove into the surf and darted in different, life-threatening directions, I shoved Worry into my back pocket, and chose to move forward with Ms. Relax and Bob Whocares. I grabbed their hands, but it only lasted the entire time of 4 minutes. F*ck it. My babies were under water.

Listen, I'd love to be that mom who could handle fearlessness oh-so-lovely,... But, truth is, I think that my lovelies could harm themselves every flippin' second of the day. Isn't that fun? Man, I used to be mellow...

OK, still mellow. Just, perhaps, more into dancing and baseball these days than cradles falling out of trees.

Happy Wednesday!